Long-Stemmed Family Curse: When to Let Superstition Take A Hike

The Curse of the Long Stemmed Roses

My mom's always had the idea that she's been cursed by roses. For a long time, when she and my dad would get into arguments, he would come home with his tail between his legs and a bouquet of long-stemmed red roses in his hands. Every time she put her roses in a vase they would immediately wilt. She tried everything to keep them alive. She cut them on an angle under running water, she experimented with different fertilizers, she tried pinching them just right, and she also asked everybody who knew anything about roses what she could do to keep them alive.

No matter what she did, the roses would wilt.

For years she told me how much she hated roses and I took that hate on as my own roses had become a symbol of hurt and they would die immediately -  it seemed like an omen. I remember one time specifically when my mom had been gifted a beautiful bouquet of red roses and they started to wilt immediately, so she gifted them to a close friend. The next day when she visited, not only had the roses started to revive themselves, but they had opened beautifully. This only further reinforced that my mother was the problem and not the methods she was using.

 

Then, it became my problem.

This idea of roses transferred to me. I remember the first time my boyfriend gave me a bouquet of long-stemmed red roses and, because of all the baggage I had attached to them, I thought, “Oh, these aren't that great.” I didn’t appreciate them as a token of love.

Family Curse Red Rose

Just last week my husband bought me a beautiful bouquet of flowers and in it were four long-stemmed roses.  This time I decided that I was going to get it right. I cut them under running water, I added the fertilizer and I pinched them just as I was taught (in a certain spot on the inside), and still - within a day - they flopped over.

An unlikely turn.

This summer my parents enjoyed their new yard in their new home. My mother has been developing a bit of a green thumb and I find this extremely interesting. Rosebush among rosebush were already planted in her garden so she added bone meal, watered them, and - you’ll never believe this - but they actually lived, and flourished! She seems to have broken the curse!

I, however, have not.

Pouting is not really my style. As I looked at my wilted roses yesterday I decided to try a different approach. I completely pulled off the tops and I threw them in a bath.

It. Was. Glorious.

I  treated myself to some pampering and felt rejuvenated instead of deflated.

I don't know why roses always die when they are given to me. I don't know if there even is such a thing as a curse or if they can just sense that I expect them to die. What I I do know is that I don't need to live in superstition. I strongly believe in intuition and I really like to pay attention to the kind of energy that's going on around me. Even so, I realize that my life is not dictated by feelings and emotions. My life is dictated by the choices that I choose to make in conjunction with, or in spite of, those emotions.

I strongly believe in intuition and I really like to pay attention to the kind of energy that’s going on around me. Even so, I realize that my life is not dictated by feelings and emotions. My life is dictated by the choices that I choose to make in conjunction with, or in spite of, those emotions.

There was a time in my life where I believed that I should completely follow my gut, but the consequence was that I was led around by emotions and feelings instead of taking control of situations. This led to a domino effect in my work where I made mistake upon mistake - and all because I was overemphasizing my feelings. I soon realized that I have more control over my actions and that it’s important to rely on both my creative right brain as well as my logical left brain - both are needed.

Sure there might be something energetically going on, but I know that I have the power to create an impetus for change.  I can move obstacles out of my way.   I can change energy by removing blocks which will allow me to move forward. Yes, it is important to pay attention to signs that are going on around us, but these signs are not the boss.  It is up to each of us to take control of our lives and move the energy - so rip the heads off those roses and throw them in a bath!

I'm still determined to learn how to get a rose to bloom, so if you have any tips or suggestions I'd love to hear them!  However, what I have come to realize is that - family curse or not -I decide what goes on in my life and, even if I don't have power over something, I have the power to decide how I will respond.

Take your power back

Is there something holding you back that you have been looking to as all powerful? A curse, a superstition, a barrier? As we look forward to 2018 I want to challenge you that you can be a soulful and connected person and take the reigns of your own life. What do you need to pull off to make that happen? Do it. 

You have one life, make the most of it. 

Heather Pinay

Authentically: Business & Life Solutions, Regina, SK

Heather Pinay is a business consultant with expertise in digital marketing. Heather owns Authentically: Business & Life Solutions, making an impact with inbound marketing, graphic design, and social media marketing. As an educator, Heather frequently shares at conferences and seminars to empower people for building the successful businesses they invision. Heather is a member of the Forbes Coaches Council.